Here is a very short story, written in fragments, about the time I recently drove three hours into the desert to pick up some tuxes for my Other Brother's wedding.
drove to the wrong tux shop.
got lost trying to find the correct tux shop.
had to go #2. really. badly.
wanted to f-ing drive my car over a cliff.
found correct tux shop.
picked up tuxes.
still had to go #2. really. badly.
20 miles away from my final destination.
tire blows out.
on the highway.
in the middle of no where.
it was hot outside.
still had to go #2. really. badly.
damsel in distress.
DPS came to the rescue.
officer was what I frequently describe as a "hottie-boom-ba-lottie"
we empty my trunk to reach spare tire.
he removes a case of 7up.
cans of 7up explode from heat exposure.
soda everywhere.
still had to go #2. really. badly.
he replaces tire.
i pick up remaining 7up case.
7ups blew their load, again.
drenched me in sticky soda.
dejavu
at least he stuck around to help me clean up.
that's what gentlemen do.
still had to go #2. really. badly.
